Under the Grasp of a Serial Cheater

Let’s say you’ve been in a relationship with this fantastic human being who’s so far rocked your world from every angle. Down the line you sense something’s off, and after little investigating (Matlock style), realize that they’ve got a significant other on the side. Do you (a) break it off completely or (b) give them the chance to amend their ways and then forgive them?

Whatever option you choose, there would always be the underlying fear that it could happen again. Do people genuinely change and change for the better? What’s the guaranty that they wouldn’t revert to their old ways when another opportunity presents itself? The truth is you never know. You never really know.

There will always be that niggling doubt at the back of your mind convincing you that you will always be second best. How do you live with the fact that it could happen again? So, let’s assume that things are going swell, the relationship is revived and going better than before. Somewhere out of the blue, another incident rears up – your suspicions come to life, he/she is cheating again. Do you (a) kick their ass to the curb once and for all or (b) give them yet another chance to redeem themselves and be faithful?

The point I’m driving at is, if indeed they’re a serial cheater and you refuse to break free from them ‘because of love’, you’ll only have yourself to blame. Does love make one foolish to the point of not seeing the truth? If they claim to love you, they wouldn’t be so quick to replace you with someone on a temporal or even permanent basis. They would be honest enough to admit that the relationship won’t work so that you each go your separate ways.

If you’re committed to someone, you stop looking for available substitutes. Why would you entangle yourself with someone else when you’re in a relationship? What’s the point of that? Your love would eventually turn to resentment and if you remain adamant, turning a blind eye to the state of your relationship, you will have only yourself to blame.

Sometimes we find all we need in one person and refuse to let go for fear of being alone, or for the belief you would never find such ‘love’ again. Well, that mindset is plain stupid. Why on earth would you want to remain committed to someone who has openly and secretly cheated on you? Someone who finds it easy to replace you; or consider your love important when adding notches to their bed posts?

Some are scared shitless of being alone but if only they knew the true intentions of their significant other, they would run for the hills. You need to determine early if they’re there for the long-haul or if you’re just a conquest to be conquered whenever and wherever – the steady lay.

Infidelity prior to marriage will only translate to infidelity after marriage. A serial cheater will sweet talk you into forgiving them time and time again, appealing to your passionate side because they know how to get to you. So, you need to stand firm in your resolve not to put up with bullshit. The truth is that each person is surrounded by temptation, but the onus is on you to resist and avoid succumbing to an easy fling. You cannot claim to be in a committed relationship with someone and yet be openly narcissistic in your approach to their love and devotion towards you, never feeling guilty or remorseful.

Don’t get captivated by all the passion, love, and attention and ignore the pattern of a serial cheater. It might hurt right now, but in the long term, you will be better off for letting them go. Do the right thing, and don’t get played.